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"Whatcha thinkin' 'bout? You been actin' strange since we got up."
"I was just thinking about all the sights we're going to see today," she fibbed.
"I can't wait! Do you 'spose the Hankersons are up yet?"
"I'm sure they are. Let's tidy up and then we'll knock on their door."
"Sure, Ma." Timmy stood on top of her bed so he could reach his own above it and straighten the covers
A sudden burst of love filled Hallie's heart for her precious son and she kissed his cheek. "I love you, Timmy."
Her boy turned and smiled. "I love you, too, Ma. I bet Pa's watchin' us from heaven right now."
Hallie felt the quick stab of tears. "I just bet you're right."
When they exited their stateroom, the Hankersons were already standing on the promenade with Sammy holding his mother's hand while his father locked their door. Sammy saw Timmy and shouted, "Timmy, have you gotten sick from the rocking of the boat? I puked three times last night, but I feel better now."
Timmy made a face. "No. I feel okay. Sure hope I don't puke."
As Hallie greeted her friends, Mr. Hankerson glanced past her. "Hello, Cooper. I hope you slept well."
Mortification flooded Hallie, but she gathered her courage and turned around. Looking rested and having actually shaved his usual growth of dark stubble to reveal an incredibly rugged, but handsome face, Cooper stared at her. It seemed that his blue eyes twinkled and his mouth quirked.
He turned his gaze on Emmett.
"I slept very well, Emmett," and then, with a pointed glance back at Hallie, he finished with, "Fresh air does wonders for a man's sleep."
Hallie's eyes widened. Is he joking with me? He doesn't seem angry. Relief tumbled off her shoulders like a flash flood.
Emmet said, "Cooper, we missed you last night, will you join us in the dining room? The food is adequate."
Hallie grinned. "Yes, please join us. It's a lovely day and I forgot to tell you food is included in the ticket price."
"I'd be pleased. As for last night, I got caught up helping families get settled on the main deck and chasing more wayward animals." He chuckled.
Emmett glanced at his wife and Hallie and made a sweeping motion. "Ladies, lead the way."
After a short wait for a table, a waiter led them to a corner with a lovely view. Cooper politely pulled out Hallie's chair and then sat across from her, with Timmy and Sammy on either side of him. Mrs. Hankerson sat next to Hallie with her husband at her other side.
Menus were placed in front of them and Timmy announced, "I'm so hungry my stomach is touching my backbone."
Sammy piped up, "I'm so hungry my belly button is touching my backbone," and everyone laughed. After that, the boys tried to outdo each other in vocal creativity.
They gave their orders to the harried waiter, a young man probably not more than twenty, with slicked back red hair and enough freckles to fill a washtub. He introduced himself as Charlie, confiding that it was his first steamboat job and someday he wanted to captain one.
Over a breakfast of biscuits, sausage gravy, scrambled eggs, cornmeal mush, and strong black coffee, Hallie found herself relaxing and enjoying adult conversation for the first time in a long while. Even when the pastor and church members stopped by to check on her, she hadn't engaged in meaningful conversation. Now, sitting here, she realized how much she missed conversing with Thomas. Being somewhat disabled, he'd read extensively and shared his knowledge with her.
Removing her thoughts from the past, Hallie turned her attention across the table. Cooper lazed back in his chair and looked from Timmy to Sammy. "Did you know that Kit Carson traveled the same trail we're about to embark on? In fact, he was one of the first to map it."
Timmy exclaimed, "Kit Carson! The mountain man all the dime novels are about?"
"The very same."
Sammy asked, "You got any of his stories?"
Cooper chuckled, "Well, now, I just might have one or two in my saddlebag. Would you like to borrow them?" He glanced at Hallie and the Hankersons. "That is, if it's all right."
Hallie smiled. "Perfectly all right."
Emmett said, "I'd love to enjoy them myself. I can read them to the boys."
After that, Timmy and Sammy couldn't stop talking about Kit Carson and his many exploits.
When they rose to leave their table, Hallie reached into her reticule to leave a tip for their young waiter with big dreams. Cooper touched her hand. "No, ma'am. I've got it. You save your money for the journey."
The expression in Cooper's eyes revealed his determination, so she gracefully nodded and followed the others to the promenade. As they stood at the railing watching waves ripple outward from the paddles, Cooper tipped the brim of his hat in a parting gesture. "I'd best check on my horse. I'll see ya'll later." He turned to leave.
Hoping Timmy wouldn't hear while his and Sammy’s attention was focused on another steamer farther upriver, Hallie asked softly, "Cooper, may I speak with you privately a moment, please?"
He adjusted his hat and motioned to an empty section of the railing. "Of course, ma'am."
When she was alone with Cooper, Hallie felt suddenly shy. "I-I just want to apologize for my unseemly behavior last night. I should never have left my stateroom. It was foolish and you were right to be angry with–"
Bending at the knees so he was on her level, Cooper interrupted with his gravelly voice; "No, ma'am, I was out of line to speak to you so offensively. I have a quick temper that sometimes gets the better of me. I should be apologizing to you."
Hallie had been avoiding his gaze, but his surprising admission made her glance quickly at him. His face was only inches from hers, and she inhaled sharply, gnawing at her lower lip. Cooper stood straight, again towering over her, and she let her eyes move up his chest to his face. He smiled a lopsided grin. "So, ma'am, let's just put that unpleasant experience behind us."
Numbly, Hallie nodded. Cooper surprised her on every account. Sometimes he seemed as rough as a blasting sand storm and other times, like now, he appeared as gentle as a mare nudging her foal in its first steps. Relief flooded Hallie that he wasn't holding her mistake against her. Glancing at his worn boots, she whispered, "Thank you."
Cooper took a step backward and she looked up to one of his endearing half smiles. Tipping his hat again, he said, "I'll see you later, Hallie," and walked away. He had only taken a couple of steps when he turned back around with a boyish expression. "I was on the deck last night because I was stargazing."
Because he was already walking away again, he didn't see Hallie's smile.
Chapter 8: Westport Bound
The five days it took the Mirabella to reach Westport Landing, docking at ports along the way to release and load passengers, cargo, and animals, were days Hallie would later remember with fondness. Little did she realize just how grueling the next five months of her life would become. During the steamboat trip, she met other emigrants bound for her same wagon train under the leadership of Captain Jeremiah J. Jones. Thomas had specifically chosen Captain Jones's train because he was considered one of the finest and most experienced drivers on the trail.
Hallie soon came to realize that the majority of people headed west were families seeking the promise of bountiful lands, beautiful streams teeming with all manner of fish, and better lives for themselves and their children. Of course, scattered amidst the families were businessmen hoping for successful ventures in the new land and prospectors with gold fever.
During her first day on the river, Hallie took inventory of her funds, and although plentiful, her practical nature had her thinking about ways to become even more frugal. While she had often chided Thomas on his tendency to overspend, she would be forever grateful he'd purchased staterooms on the Mirabella. He had saved her the harshness of having to sleep on the main deck without benefit of a room or food. The poor women whose husbands were unable to afford first class accommodations, looking haggard and bedraggled, did their best for their families by preparing meals fro
m their own goods and attempting to create privacy by hanging blankets. Hallie felt guilty for having so much when others had so little, and made a mental note to help others as occasions arose.
The closer they came to Westport Landing, the more the banks of the river teemed with emigrants camping alongside it until their wagon trains left. Most trains left by the end of April, weather permitting. The spring grasses were absolutely necessary for the grazing of livestock. Thomas had said that leaving too early was as dangerous as leaving too late and taking the chance of being caught in the winter snows.
Riffling through her trunk, Hallie retrieved a sheet of writing paper, unpacked her ink and quill, and began making lists of the items she would need to purchase. Because prices were higher farther along the trail and the quality less, Cooper said they would purchase everything in Westport.
After a short time, her head started to spin with the immensity of what would be required—flour, cornmeal, rice, sugar, coffee, tea, beans, hardtack, salt pork, tin plates and cups, utensils, blankets, wash tub and scrub board, soap—and those were only a few of the small items. The necessities on her large items and animals list included a sturdy wagon and oxen, milk cow, chickens, tools, and that was just the beginning.
Her head pounding with anxiety, she set her writing aids aside and thought about Thomas's calm demeanor—such a kind man. Tears of loneliness escaped her resolve not to cry and dripped from her chin onto her lists. Sniffling, she did what Thomas always suggested when life became too overwhelming; she closed her eyes, breathed deeply, and envisioned the end from the beginning. She imagined a homey cabin snuggled amidst tall trees and a bubbling creek filling the air with happy, gurgling sounds. She envisioned a bend in the creek and, lifting the skirt of a pretty blue calico dress, skipped around it, laughing…
Hallie's eyes popped wide open. Hallie, what are you thinking? She had visualized Cooper fishing with Timmy. When he glanced up and saw her, he handed his pole to Timmy, opened his arms, and waited for her to run into them.
Wiping the vision from her mind, Hallie jumped up, folded her list and stuffed it in her reticule. Foolish, foolish, woman, she scolded herself.
Chapter 9: Land Legs
The Mirabella docked at Westport Landing in the midst of a downpour. Even so, travelers couldn't wait to depart the ship, especially those who had been making due on the main deck. Standing under the overhang of the promenade, Cooper glanced at Hallie, Timmy, and the Hankersons. "Doesn't look like this weather is going to let up anytime soon, but I'm sure the captain will be shooing us off his ship to prepare for his return trip."
Hallie asked, "Where's Sweet Pea?"
Cooper responded, "I paid one of the older boys of an emigrant family with a passel of kids—ten was my last count—to take her to the closest stable and wait for me."
Hallie frowned. "I'm sure that's an expense you hadn't planned on. I'll reimburse you after we're settled for the day."
Cooper returned Hallie's frown and set his jaw at a now recognizable, stubborn angle. "No, ma'am, I'll not take any money for anything to do with my horse."
"But, Cooper–"
He interrupted; "Ma'am, Sweet Pea is my responsibility, and besides, you need everything you've got to outfit yourself for this train."
Sammy glanced back and forth between the two of them. "Aw, do we have to wait for Miz Hallie to buy a dress? We already been standin' here since forever waitin' for the rain to let up."
For a second, the meaning of his words escaped everyone's understanding, but when they realized he had misunderstood Cooper's reference to Hallie "outfitting" herself, the group laughed, easing the tension between them Hallie and Cooper.
While Emmett chuckled and lifted Sammy onto his shoulders, Cooper motioned to two deck hands. "I'll direct these young chaps in delivering your trunks to the dock and will meet ya'll under that blue awning after I hire a buckboard." He pointed across the muddy wharf road to the weathered façade and overhang of a store whose sign, hanging at a precarious tilt, simply said, "Outfitter."
Having decided to continue her financial discussion with Cooper later, Hallie opened her umbrella, acknowledged Cooper with a nod, and grasped Timmy's hand to follow the Hankersons off the ship and across the road.
* * *
Cooper watched Hallie's retreat. The diminutive woman was certainly stubborn. He recognized the set of her shoulders brooked no argument, but hell would freeze over before he'd allow her to shoulder expenses for his horse. His first impression of her as a determined, although easily manipulated woman, had been mightily disproved. From the look in her eyes, he hadn't heard the last about her reimbursing him. He could only imagine her indignation when he refused payment for his services at the end of the journey. When she'd tried to pay him before leaving Jebson, he'd refused her money, pacifying her by saying he wanted to be paid at the end of the trail, after he earned his fee He chuckled because he knew holy hell was going to break loose at that encounter.
Most people considered him to be as poor as a church mouse, which suited him just fine. In reality, he'd saved over the years and made a few wise investments, but gambling winnings constituted the bulk of his money. And because of the condition of the farm he'd purchased, the money forked out hadn't set him back much at all.
Cooper's amusement faded however when he remembered the reason for his generosity to Hallie. He knew she would want an explanation and he wasn't sure he wanted to admit his failure as a husband and father.
Oh, Jake, I wish I'd been the kind of man your ma could've counted on, even if she couldn't love me. I wish I'd been around to see you grow up."
Regret washed over Cooper more powerfully than the sudden watershed from the dreary clouds. When Marybeth had told him she wanted a divorce, he'd laughed. Divorce simply wasn't done. Once a man was married, he was married for good. He'd changed his mind, however, but it wasn’t her tears and pleas that did it; it was walking in on her in bed with the local banker. He'd almost killed the bastard, but Marybeth's shrieks and determination to protect him with her own body made Cooper realize something—she truly loved the gray-haired banker with his handlebar mustache. In fact, the man's own attempt to protect Marybeth at the cost of his own life was another jolt for Cooper—the banker loved Marybeth just as vehemently. After that, there was no way they could stay married. Hell, he hadn’t been a good husband or father anyway, what with leaving for long periods to drive herds of longhorns along the Shawnee Trail from Texas to Missouri. Although he always cared for the practical needs of his family, emotionally, he hadn't been there for them.
As for Jake, he loved the boy, but didn’t know how to be a father, having been abandoned himself at the age of six by a prostitute mother and raised by an uncle who already had ten kids he liked to beat the daylights out of, with Cooper being his new favorite.
When Cooper turned twenty and met Marybeth, a pretty, black-headed gal with a voluptuous figure, he was smitten by lust…and then love. Her being five years older didn’t bother him at all. In fact, it added to her allure. She'd been married in her teens and widowed at the age of twenty-two. To her sadness, she'd had no children with her first husband and desperately wanted them. Cooper was more than happy to oblige, but never having had a father, he soon felt weighted with the responsibility and found himself on the range often. All Marybeth ever wanted was a loving family, and when he thought about it later, he understood her unfaithfulness. The banker was everything Cooper wasn't.
That nasty encounter was the epiphany he needed to give his wife her freedom. Lowering the gun he'd threatened Marybeth and the banker with, he said, "Marybeth, you can have your divorce." After that, he stayed long enough to sign the papers and say goodbye to Jake. Never having spent much time with his father, the three-year-old lifted a chubby hand to wave goodbye and then went back to playing with his wooden horse in the dirt. That was his last memory of his son. His boy was turning fifteen in a few days and Cooper wasn't the reckless young man he had once been. But it
was too late for him and his boy.
Jake was the reason Cooper couldn't accept payment for helping Hallie. In some strange way, helping Hallie and Tim was atonement for the fiasco he had created with Marybeth and Jake. Maybe it didn't make sense, but most of his life hadn't made sense.
Cooper returned his thoughts to the present. Nope, Hallie, you can fight me tooth and nail, but I won't take a dime of your money.
Acquiring a buckboard and loading the trunks took quite some time, what with everyone and his brother attempting to do the same thing, but finally, Cooper located the livery, retrieved Sweet Pea and tied her to the back of the buckboard, and then pulled to the front of the Outfitters store where Tim and Emmett leaned against the siding and Lydia and Sammy sat on a bench. He didn't see Hallie.
"Whoa!" he called to the horses, pulling them in front of an adjoining business—a dining room with grimy windows and a lopsided sign tacked near the door that advertised, Special of the Day—Meatloaf and Tators, looking like it had been scrawled years earlier. He jumped off the buckboard, looped the reins around the hitching post, and walked toward the store. The Hankersons and Tim met him on the boardwalk.
Tim grinned, the gaping hole of his missing tooth the first thing anyone saw when talking to the boy. "Howdy Mr. Jerome; Ma's in the store checking on supplies."
Cooper almost groaned aloud. He sure hoped the woman wasn't making any purchases. This would be the last place he'd buy necessities—its worn down condition and location making the supplies questionable and the prices exorbitant.
Cooper tipped his hat. "I best check on your ma." He quickly stepped around the boy. Inside the store, he found her engaged in conversation with a greasy geezer who looked to be older than God. He heard her say, "So, Mr. Tucker, you're telling me that you've got the best prices anywhere in the area?"
The old man jawed his tobacco and turned to spit the black stuff in a rusty spittoon. "Yep, little lady, that's what I'm sayin'."